As I was scrolling through facebook a few days ago, I came across a post that moved me. Not in a good way either. It shook my heart & woke me up a bit. You see, I live in a small town. I have a big, welcoming family. A partner who loves me for all that I am. A son who admires me without hesitation. It is rare that I am approached with a negative remark or hateful action – I mean, I get the occasional look of road rage when a stranger doesn’t like my driving but for the most part, I remain quite naïve about the hate that still exists in this modern world… Simply because I have worked so hard to create a space around me where it won’t thrive…
Can we all agree that our media channels are full of opinions? It just so happens that it’s full of a lot of opinions on politics lately. Sure… in some ways, for good reason. But this isn’t really a political thing. So, don’t let me scare you away just yet…
It’s a filter thing. A an ignorance thing. A responsibility thing.
We’re reading articles about young children, OUR BABIES, repeating unbearable words of ignorance. We’re hearing stories from our children’s mouths of classmates who are fearful & confused about what is right or wrong. We are seeing status posts from angry mothers of young children who have been the target of racism.
I am hurt & so sad that there are people in the world who are able to hold such positions of power. Positions to simply control, manipulate & spread hate. People who in whatever way they can, want their voice to trickle down into the ears of our children & steer their innocent little hearts wrong.
I need to ask you for a favor, if you don’t mind?
Can we, as mothers, as a village, help hold each other accountable? I’m begging you, PLEASE?
Accountable for filtering our children from that hate & ignorance as much as humanly possible? To teach them about kindness, acceptance & love but to also be open minded? Now, before you think I want to stick my child in a bubble & lead him to believe that the real world is one big fairy tale & nothing bad ever happens… That if you give love, you will always be loved in return… That is not my intent because we all know darn well that isn’t the truth.
I will however try to find a balance of moderation amongst the madness. That’s a bit what it feels like to turn on the news or read some of the feeds lately. So, I choose not to watch the news. Instead, I choose only to seek reliable sources for the information I am after and limit my son’s ability to be exposed to the television or internet. I make a choice each day to seek out positivity, inspiration & motivation to uplift myself & in return uplift my child with light & love.
Besides, the TV & internet, can we take some responsibility for what comes out of our own mouths, eh???
I am NO saint. Far, far from it. I try my best to be kind. I judge out of my own flaws but always regret it. I acknowledge that when I am unkind, it more often than not, is my own shit – not theirs. I am learning every day to allow grace for when I fall short, as we all do.
But I just can’t imagine my child ever making another child feel; less than, not welcome, belittled or singled out because of something I said or did to make him think that it’s okay to do that. Because it NEVER will be.
I also do my best to protect our space from those who speak with hate in their words & intentions. And when it happens, I hope to in that moment, be brave enough to speak up. I owe it to my partner for filtering the word “hate” alone out of our home. Though flawed, we do our best to lead by example. Learning as we go – some lessons take longer than others – Like the one I wrote about my uncle “In the face of adversity | What is Religion?”
So, please mothers, let’s have grace on ourselves and each other. But let’s speak up when needed. With empathetic words, may we find a way to respectfully challenge each other’s views, opinions & voice of reason. Let’s find comfort in knowing that we all make mistakes & have the ability to learn from sharing them with each other without being shamed. Let’s not be afraid to spew showers of light & love around us so that others feel empowered to do the same.
Mothers, let’s speak openly of loving, supporting & accepting all of our brothers & sisters. Of the tribe mentality. Of the village who help raise our children. Of the rising of women empowering women. Of the people before us who challenged boundaries, rights & made progress. Of the trust we have in knowing that people will always be made of more good than bad. That our world is a beautiful place, full of beautiful people if we choose to see it & teach it.
Let them see us define love & in turn do the same.
Let us do our best to be accountable & take responsibility for what they see, hear & learn within our space. And when we no longer remain their only guide, let us remember that we will always be their most influential teacher.